Swiss Scientists Opts To Tear Your Soul Apart By Late Summer

Read an article earlier today in one of the Swedish morning papers about the soon-to-be launched CERN Large Hadron Collider.

Scientists at the CERN Large Hadron Collider (LHC) in Switzerland, the worlds only particle accelerator are in the process of trying to recreate a miniature Big Bang. The aim is to investigate the origins of the universe by finding proof of existence of up until now unknown particles, and to ratify or falsify two of particle physics more controversial theorys, the one about supersymmetry and the one about extra hidden dimensions, unperceivable by our human measly three space dimensions plus one time dimension.

Some concerns has previously been raised against the LHC, earlier this year two Russian scientists raised their fingers in warning, claiming the device may actually create a rip in the fabric of time, working as the worlds first time machine. But I'm not really that bothered about this, having tried out this time-travel stuff before myself, the only thing I managed to create was a rip in the fabric of my brand new sweater (no sultans of ping fc).

So, I continued to read the article until I came half way through, then i froze where i sat! The article told that as a side effect to this particle smashing business, the scientists claims that there is a good chance the experiment will result in opening new doors to unknown universes and dimensions.

WTF, what's wrong with these people? Have these genius-retards never heard of Clive Barker?? You should never play with the lament configuration box, and never ever ever open up ANY doors to other dimensions.. never ever.. So, better book your summer holidays soon, cause the weather forecast for late august calls for high humidity, tons of extradimensional Cenobites up in this, and rusty chains tearing at human flesh. Ooh, and I hope you have enjoyed this blog post, cause down the dark decades of your pain, this will seem like a memory of heaven.